Steam Poem

[Pierre-Marie Baty]

Here it comes baby... woohoo

An Award

Especially before colleagues and customers,
One thing we always try, is not to look stupid.
We always want to show the skills of a master ;
When they catch us in fault, shame is something horrid

Unfortunately some don't seem to think that way ;
They release gigabytes of untested sowtware,
Full of bugs, stuffed with holes, and it takes you a day ~
Cause you must download it, often with old hardware.

I really don't get why it can't seem obvious,
That all these guys will do, is just ruining their fame ;
Losing their customers, and put their firm to shame.

For me like for others, Steam is obnoxious;
I decree an award for spoiling a good game,
Turning a great idea into something lame.


Notice this time...? it's a sonnet.

Round Three, Fight!

[-=RAV=-AdrianShephard]

nice one

[stefanhendriks]

*stumbled* so... beautifull... *snif*

[-=RAV=-AdrianShephard]

make this as sticky

we shud copy this to steam forums

The Steam Cycle

Get on my computer its time to play

Maybe CS or DOD today.

I haven't been on fo awhile lets hope all is well

I heard that this new steam crap should all be sent to hell.8o

I get on fileplanet to get the steam game

d^mn all these pop ups are d^mn stupid and lame.>

Finally get to download all these new files.

Hate this waiting garbage it takes quite awhile.:RTFM:

Now to install and get on the road

tobad steam takes forever to load.:RTFM:

Steam finally loads, Im Almost Done

Can get online and shoot up some fun.

Updating platform files, great something more

Have enough time to deal a prostitute and a wh0re.:o

Create New account dis should be good

cd key accepted, I knew it would.

Downloading Game files another f^cking wait.:'(

Dang out of money guess now I gotta Masturb@te.

Good its done now time to play

"Steam script error" another delay.???

Now I am mad gotta restart computer:RTFM:

I am gonna cap some ass wit my 9mm shooter.:RTFM:

Get back on lets try some more

Man This bullshit is becomin a bore.9_9

Get into game woot now for some fun8D

Ima go in der and shoot wit my gun.

1 kill no deaths now im glad

Spontaneous shut down! now im mad.>

New Steam update Avaialble My friend....

Now we do this bullshit all over again.......:RTFM:

[Pierre-Marie Baty]

l33t! a great one!
someone should make a rap song of it...

okay, I suppose this one won the round three....


Now on for round four: how about haikus ?
5/5/7 syllabons
that should be easier for wannabe poets like me


Enjoying Deathmatch
Fury and Firefights
Bombed back to Desktop: Steam Error

[Pierre-Marie Baty]

Originally Posted by botmeister

...and a crappy game tonight

(PMB: HEY!!!! )

Steam is Hell

steam is hell

waiting all the way!

O what fun it is to wait

on a 56K modem delay

...

*cosack dance*

SWEET one, how could I miss that!

[-=RAV=-AdrianShephard]

LOL the steam process one was GREAT 1337 BRAVO N1 I AM EMAILING IT TO VALVE

[-=RAV=-AdrianShephard]

bump

i think we shud bring this back for the recent hatred of steam

[>BKA< T Wrecks]

A foul strike to counter

Once upon a time people played
and enjoyed shooting each other's head
in a game called Counter-Strike.

The game was quite heavily debated
because of its content, yet top-rated
by pros and amateurs alike.

Update followed update, up to one-five,
every so many months a patch to apply.
Every PC magazine in stores just nearby
had the patch on CD to keep CS alive.

No need to have DSL,
56k worked quite well,
nobody yet had to tell
Valve guys to go straight to hell.

After quite a long time, out came one-six,
But alas! It came packed in a suspicios mix
with a software we know by its name and its tricks
which it plays on our cost, despite desperate clicks

that eventually turn out to do nothing but fail.

(Well, you know the routine,
and I bet you have seen
it all dance on your screen
while you were somewhere between
crash and reboot, blue screen and retry
hysterical laughter and desperate cries)

- And you know from the start it's to no avail.

An even worse curse than your average crash
is having to download anew all the cache
which takes ages even for lucky DSL'ers
and makes us all become Steam story tellers
sharing our individual woe and defeat,
be it in clear text or written in 1337.

Yes, Steam is the name that struck fear in our hearts,
it's what made our well-working games fall apart

- right from the start.

It kept us away from M4 and from Deagle
and despite this counts as perfectly legal

- Say, is this art?

If I were to deny
some poor passers-by
their good right to play
something they bought some day
they would put me in jail
to spend a long spell
locked away in a cell,
for a toilet a pail
and no way to get out
of this filthy game,
damned to helplessly shout
"What you did was the same!"

(William T. Wreckspeare)